Oh, look! I made it back! Within the month even! So…I figured I would join Liz in Transparency Tuesday. Seems like a good place to start…especially given since it’s the one thing that I feel I really excel at. I’m not good at sugar coating and painting rainbows and smiley faces on everything. (Much to my MiL’s chagrin.) Life is messy and even ugly at times and I feel that if I/we don’t embrace that, we’re going to end up barking mad trying to cover it up with all those rainbow colored Sharpie markers.
I’m really lucky in a lot of ways. That seemed to be the theme the universe was determined to point out to me last night with my YouTube feed… One of the women I watch is getting divorced. Another is going in for IVF treatments. Here I sit, happily married and pregnant with our last baby. I’m in pain and fatigued a lot, but…I can have whatever color hair I want. (“Smokey violet,” is in the works.) And while I haven’t been diagnosed yet, I suppose that that means that there’s hope too; whatever has been going on might be curable or at least treatable to bring my quality of life back again. (It feels like a small hope, but…it’s there.) So…I totally take ownership of the fact that most of my grievances are probably “first world problems.” That said…
Last week I felt awful (I still feel closer to 40% than my usual 60% of what used to be ‘normal’ for me). So…I cleaned our mattress. I can’t just sit still and wallow when I feel bad or I end up feeling worse. It makes me world’s worst patient, but it is what it is. Anyway, if you haven’t had a baby and/or co-slept with one, let me tell you what that looks like; pee. Lots of leaky diapers and, “I’m too tired… I’ll just change the baby right here on the bed real quick… Efffffff my life!” Not the soaked-through-and-through, time-to-take-this-shizz-out-back-and-burn-it type of thing, but…enough to make me wince when I’d change out the sheets. So…five minutes on Pinterest later…viola`! Using Katelyn’s recipe of 1 cup hydrogen peroxide, 3 tablespoons of baking soda, and a drop (or 3) of liquid hand dishwashing soap, I tackled the stains. And? It worked pretty darned good! There are still a few spots that I’m going to try straight ammonia on when it’s nice enough to open the windows again but, for the most part, the mattress looks about 4 years younger!
Then there’s this one small thing that is making me rashy, though it probably shouldn’t… My husband has taken up hanging up his pajama pants before bed at night (he doesn’t actually sleep in them…just wears them after his shower after work). Instead of dropping them on the bedroom floor, he’s started hanging them on the towel bar in the bathroom where I’d been putting them up for the longest time. And…I mean…I’m counting it as a victory in many ways; it’s one less thing on my overflowing set of metaphorical dishes, but…it feels like he’s rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic when there are things that I either cannot do (litter boxes while pregnant) or struggle to keep up with (pretty much the entire rest of the house).
A week or so ago, he vowed that he was going to spend an hour a day helping to clean. I think that’s happened twice? Maybe? I knew it wasn’t realistic; he does work a good deal and that’s like jumping into the deep end on the first day of swimming lessons… But I thought that maybe he would at least pitch in 15 to 30 minutes a day. Or take care of the cat boxes more regularly. I am glad that he’s making some attempt. I just wish it was more consistent.
Meanwhile, there’s always that mom in the FaceBook group of moms whose husband just knows how busy her day is with kids so he does all of their cooking and cleaning for her and rubs her feet at night before bed too! *epic eye roll*
I’m off to try to do about 500 things before my body forces me into submissive rest again, but happy #TransparencyTuesday everyone!